Have you ever just missed someone so much you could cry? That you've gone to loads of different places and no matter who you're with, where it is, or even what you're doing. You miss them so much. And you just want to know what day you’re going to see/talk to them so you can like count down the minutes, days, hours? Maybe even weeks. It just sucks.
I always find myself asking questions like what if I didn't argue with you? Yup, okay I'm taking ALL the blame for what happened to us. I should have save the argument. I shouldn't have done it, I really know, but it made me think clearly so I'm not regretting. I just felt sorry for myself. During those time i'm still indecisive. I'm was thinking if I should let go or hold on cause I don't know what's going on with your mind. Your last words made me realize what should be realized.
It does make you weak to miss someone. Sure, you can spend all your time convincing yourself that you’re mad, that you hate that person. You thought it would make it hurt less. Instead you only ended up wishing for them to come back on every shooting star, every penny you threw into a fountain, every prayer.
And that’s okay , I guess. It’s okay to miss someone. Maybe they’ve changed. Maybe not. Maybe you haven’t talked to them for days, weeks, months or years. Maybe they never left your mind ever since the second they left. Yes, I miss someone. I don’t know what will change that…time? I think NOT! Life doesn’t always give us what we want && maybe a loss is a lesson. Even if they never make a reappearance in your life again, their memory will always stay with you. You'll just realized that those are some of the defining moments of your life.
I know that person is really good one. But I didn’t listen to my heart, I listened to my head. I guess sometimes listening to your heart is the better way to go. It’s a risky choice, but some things are just worth the risk. I was unappreciative of that person during the last convo that truly ended it. That was my mistake. I’ve learned from my mistakes. Too bad the mistakes were made with that person.
It’s horrible missing someone. Whether it’s a family member, a friend or someone you have/had feelings for. It just creates an aching feeling in your tummy and you feel numb. You know you can’t do much to change it, and knowing this makes it 50x worse. Knowing you’re not missed back is pretty shit too
You’re not texting me at the moment, so I’m just re-reading our text conversations like the girly girl that I am.
HEY THIS IS FOR YOU!
I miss that we could laugh at each other and it be okay. I miss when you said you couldn't wait to see me. I miss how patient you were with me. I miss your genuine kindness. I miss you teaching me new things. I miss telling you things I've never said before. I miss how much you would amaze me everyday. I miss how you changed my life everyday. I miss that pinky promise we made. I miss how you had complete and utter trust in me. I miss knowing I was irreplaceable to you. I miss sharing everything with you. I miss being unafraid to tell you everything. I miss your tenderness. I miss never having to ask if we were okay. I miss how we always send mixed messages. I miss the way you would tease me. I miss knowing that you would always fight for me. I miss when I'd sing to you ever the phone. I miss wrestling with you. I miss taking pictures with you. I miss when you'd listen to me. I miss when we made a mess together. I miss that you were the only one person who truly understand me. I miss our big plans & making plans with you. I miss the no holds barred conversation with you. I miss staying up late and talking about our dreams (till 3-4am). I miss you so much :/
Before i always thought to myself. what would I do without you?? Now I know. I feel so incomplete!